A few months ago, I hit a wall.

I wasn’t tired from lack of sleep. I’d been working out, eating well, keeping my schedule tight. On paper, everything looked fine.

But inside, I felt heavy. Sluggish. Like I was trying to run my system on battery saver mode.

So I did what most of us do when feel drained: I pulled back.

I canceled plans. Got quiet. Tried to “recharge” alone. Except the more space I gave myself, the worse I felt.

Eventually, I realized I wasn’t low on mental energy.

I was emotionally drained.

All the feelings I didn’t want to deal with (frustration, guilt, uncertainty) had built up like water behind a dam. And holding them back was zapping more energy than letting myself actually experience them.

Today we’re talking about why emotional suppression feels like control but quietly drains your energy, and how to restore flow without burning out.

The emotional energy paradox

As Fives, we’re experts at managing what drains us.

We build systems. We control variables. We protect our bandwidth like it’s gold.

But here’s the paradox: the more tightly you try to contain your emotions, the faster your energy disappears.

Think of a dam. It doesn’t generate power by simply holding water back. It generates power by letting water flow through in a regulated way.

Your emotions work the same way.

When you hold them back, you’re not conserving energy. You’re blocking it.

Containment feels safe, but it costs more than it saves.

Unfortunately, most Fives don't realize this until it's too late and their dam bursts...

Why thinking doesn’t move emotional energy

When things get hard, our instinct is to think our way out of it.

We analyze. Label. Introspect.

But no matter how much understanding we build, the fatigue stays.

That’s because emotions aren’t meant to be solved, they’re meant to move.

They live in the body, not the mind.

And movement doesn’t come from thinking. It comes from expression.

It’s not about being dramatic. It’s about letting the current run through you instead of holding it in.

Sound scary? I get that. But, the good news is you don't have to open the floodgates all at once. In fact, that would probably do more harm than good.

Instead, the key is to practice regulating the flow, opening up a little at a time as you continue to build confidence and rewire your nervous system to handle more emotional expression.

This week’s experiment: test the dam theory

Let’s turn this into data.

1. Pick something you’ve been carrying quietly, something that feels emotionally charged.
2. Choose one person who feels safe to you (someone who listens without trying to fix).
3. Say it out loud. Don’t soften it or turn it into a joke. Just name it honestly.
4. Afterward, notice how your energy has shifted.

Do you feel lighter?
Clearer?
More grounded?

You’re not practicing vulnerability for its own sake. You’re collecting information about how your energy system really works.

If you notice that sharing left you feeling more alive than depleted, that’s your proof. When you stop holding everything back, you stop mistaking containment for strength.

And you might find that the energy you’ve been missing wasn’t lost, it was just trapped behind the emotional dam you built to feel safe.